Still in My Heart by Kathryn Smith

Author:Kathryn Smith
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
ISBN: 9780061736841
Publisher: HarperCollins

When Eleanor and Brahm returned from the orangery, Eleanor went up to her room to rest. It was amazing what simply talking about things had done for her state of mind. She was no longer plagued by confusing thoughts or doubts. She knew the truth. She believed Brahm.

That didn’t mean she wholly disbelieved Lydia. Perhaps Brahm was right and her sister had actually convinced herself that her own version of events years ago was the truth. Or perhaps she was right and Lydia simply sought to protect her from a man she believed to be the lowest kind.

It hardly mattered what Lydia’s motives were. Eleanor and Brahm understood each other. He cared about her, and she about him. Feelings from years before had lingered, masked on her side by hurt and anger, but even she had to admit that she had often thought of him over the years, and held every man she met up against the impression he had made. It had been easy for those feelings to return because neither of them had ever let them truly leave.

How odd it was to realize that those feelings for him had remained alive inside her for so long. Cloistered and sheltered she might have been as an unattached lady, but she was still the daughter of an earl, and she had met many gentlemen over the years. She’d never wanted one of them the way she wanted Brahm.

He was so flawed, so imperfect, and yet that was what made him so perfect as far as she was concerned. He was a man who would not expect her to mother him. He was strong and independent. He was someone she could lean on when she needed support. He knew the truth was not always pretty and yet he preferred it, both to say and to hear.

He also had fought a tremendous battle and won. Her reading taught her just how difficult it could be for someone caught in the clutches of strong drink to break free. Oftentimes their minds and bodies would rebel against them. They would see things that weren’t there, shake and tremble violently. The idea of Brahm suffering such awful things in the course of shucking off the demon that drove him broke her heart. And he had been all alone when he did it. His brothers had no doubt helped him, but they could not be there for him all the time.

She should have been there for him. If things had gone as they should have years ago, she would have been the one to help him through such a difficult time. But that hardly signified now. All that mattered now was that he had won his personal battle. He had come out of it a better and wiser man.

And to think she had been so prepared to toss him out of her house when he arrived a fortnight ago! Eleanor had to shake her head when she thought of it. He had come there determined to prove to her that he had changed.

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